Ulli Jacklin

Buddhist program coordinator

Buddhist program coordinator

My name is Ulli Jacklin, and I'm actually originally from Austria, but right now I live in Pagosa Springs, Colorado. At the moment, I work as a program coordinator for the Shift Network, which is actually a fairly recent development. And the decision to take this position was also part of the Unravel process, when we were learning how to make aligned decisions.

Right before Unravel, I feel like I was a ball of wool and string that's all jumbled up. I was also sort of on the job search. There was also this question like, "Oh do, where do I live?" There were lots of decisions in the year. What do I want to do with the rest of my life? 

Just a month before the program started, our family was really shocked by the diagnosis of my mother with a cancer with no cure. I think everything that could be unstable in your life was sort of unstable when I started Unravel.

I definitely was looking for more clarity in my life in terms of life decisions and where I want to go next. 

Before committing to Unravel, I had this fear: do I have time to do this right now and attend the lives? Because, you know, if I do something, I want to do it wholeheartedly. I was really busy with taking care of my mother and doing other things. I'm so happy that I didn't let myself be held back by that.

I would say Unravel is a deep immersion into the depths of being, of consciousness, in a group. And I think that group factor is really important. It is deep, healing, and fun! 

So it's just like all of us went together on a journey and if you go for a hike, there's different patches of it. First, it's rocky and steep and, you know, some people might take a break and others go on. And then at some point you just get into the groove of it and it starts flowing more. And then towards the end you reach this beautiful alpine lake and, and you just have a view from above. I think that's how I would describe the unravel journey as a metaphor.

Coming into Unravel, I had a background of 12 years of deep inner exploration that was jump started in my early twenties by a very dramatic breakup and very soon dove pretty deeply into the Buddhist path.

What is one thing I left the Unravel journey with? It comes back a little bit to that question of owning your power and owning, stepping into your power. And, and I think that combined with what we had done just a week before with like embracing our contradictions really set the stage to just be able to integrate all of the parts that are part of our psyche, right? And so one thing that I really felt like I reclaimed was just this sense of empowerment and, and force and energy and belief in myself.

To some degree that was definitely linked to integrating shadows because there was a big shadow of me that sort of does want to have power or authority or is a little bit of a know-it-all. And unless you have that integrated, you can't really step into that power fully.

I have not been in a group where I have yet received so much support and love back. Like everything that was shared was met with an unconditional welcome and cheers and congratulations. There was no judgment, there was no, you know, negative comments ever. And just right there, this unconditional love and acceptance, when we receive that from somebody else, it's easier for us to do that for ourselves because it's, I think it's most difficult for us to accept ourselves unconditionally.

And so it's so difficult for oneself to share sometimes the most intimate thoughts or parts in a group, but the more that happened in the cocoon and you just experienced that, "oh, I'm just being accepted here," you know, it, it helps you to accept those parts of yourself, first of all. And then as a consequence, it just opens yourself up, it opens up your heart, it opens up your psyche to share more. And, and right there it's, that is a key for healing. Like that unconditional love and acceptance from outside and from for yourself is key for healing.

I feel like I've definitely been able to have more acceptance for all parts of myself and really being less judgmental also with parts that maybe seem contradictory or don't make sense. I sort of gave up a little bit of that sense of you have to be this totally coherent person, but giving myself more permission to just, you know, be and accept what is at the moment and just go with, in acceptance and love more.

I would say the Unravel journey for me is the core of life. Like why are we here? It's not to go through life and run, you know, after stressed day, after stressed day and trying to get this and that.

You know, I think we're fundamentally here to explore consciousness, to explore our potential, to find harmony and to out of this place than better serve others. And you can only get to this place of open-heartedness and kindness and compassion through unraveling, through unwinding the different parts of your psyche and things that happened maybe in your childhood where you didn't have all the tools yet that yet deeply marked you.

And so by going back and unraveling whatever happened, you become less complicated. It's like, you know, like unraveling a jumbled ball of wool, you know, you need to do that in order to start a knitting project. So in order to be helpful in life and be of service to the humanity or the planet, really, you have to unravel first and make some sort of sense and find acceptance for whatever happened in your life and is happening right now.

And then that sets the groundwork for everything else that we do in life.

I also left Unravel with a big connection with embodiment. Being in your body, feeling those emotions through, you're healing them. The other thing where embodiment is hugely helpful is, for making decisions. There is a lot of wisdom in our body. So by having more embodiment, we also tap into a whole other source of knowing that, in my experience really is the better way of taking decisions than by writing down a list of pros and cons. 

If you're on the fence about Unravel, I would just say go for it. Take this step, go to the places that scare you, which is a very famous quote and you know, there won't be any change in life unless we do get out of our comfort zone. And Unravel really is a place where you can trust the community with a very skilled guide to hold you through that process. So it's safe, there's no danger. So just dare to take that step and it will just bear fruit.


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